Jungle Drums

Singapore shopping centres are invaded by rodents. That's right. Not ordinary rodents, but bargain-sniffing rodents. Armed with the male rodents' credit cards, or simply cold hard cash, they attempt to fill up their shopping bags as much as possible. Blog owner has a business idea to provide quick deploying benches for the comfort the unfortunate males. They'll pay, no doubt, for a place to rest their tired legs, and possibly allow their credit cards to cool down after the incessant swiping by their mates. Female rodents are characterized by their wild-eyed look when they see the word 'sale'. Typical behaviour include signs of anxiety, temporary loss of sanity and logic, which typically leads to buying of items that are not practical, simply because 'cheap wat'. Studies have shown males to be willing to pay the extra dollar for something they need, whereas females are willing to pay a dollar less for something they do not need. during this state of euphoria, females display primal territorial traits, where they guard their purchases carefully with their lives. Although the primitive practice of peeing to mark territory has long ceased, the females simply do so by dumping the merchandise on the males, who are tasked with the arduous... task to guard the purchases. However, it is noted by many observers that once the products make it home, the females do not actually use them much. This is something that many scholars have tried to decipher over many years, but no conclusion has been reached yet. For example, females love to buy shoes, but they only have one pair of legs. The shoes they buy range from the uncomfortable but undeniably sexy super high heels, to the cheapo flip flops. Most of the shoes gather dust and are worn only once in a few weeks or even months, or in the extreme cases, years.

They also love to buy handbags, in which they love to stuff all their worldly belongings, like makeup, mobile phone, home keys and car keys, tissue paper (to reserve seats during lunchtime), ID card, driver's license, receipts, notepads, pens, tampons, PDAs, makeup, water bottle ("Sweetened water is soooo 80s..."), swimwear ("So i can go and swim in the gym pool when i'm free..."), nail clippers, nail polish, nail polish remover, blotting paper, iPod, makeup again, mobile phone earpiece, and purses. Their purses contain typically: credit cards, discount coupons (both expired and valid), receipts, name cards, membership cards for various departmental stores, blotting paper, cash, photographs, motivational cards, cute Precious Moments cards, little bit of cash and if the coin pouch is not separate, coins. Males typical carry: Cash, credit cards, coins, IDs, membership cards. And maybe iPod. Males generally are stronger after being with a relationship with a female rodent because they are made to carry the merchandise and handbags of the females while the females are hunting.

That's all for this week's educational report.